It is a time to rejoice. It is a time to sing. The druids say we have pleased Gabe enough for him to bestow upon us the Steam Summer Sales. This time, my brothers and sisters, is a time for sharing, a time for purchasing, a time for gifting your weird friends Farming Simulator 2015 at an extremely discounted price and a time to thank Gabe. I hope your soul never knows the pain of paying more than $9.99 for the XCOM Complete Collection.
It has been foretold, in the fires, that the sale will not last forever. This time of prosperity and happiness will end and we will once again fall into the dark grip of fully priced titles. We must prepare, for this time is coming. The druids say that 10 moons will pass upon which this time of miracles will end. Gabe will leave us in the shadow of the sales with our coin purses crippled. Many moons will pass before we see it’s like. However, the winter cometh.
Alas, I am sure our druids will lead us through that time of difficulty. For now they advise we continue to please Gabe and play hard.